Separating after fifty

A frequent scenario that we see as family solicitors are people in their fifties or older, who have been in a long marriage and found that they no longer have much in common with their partner and want advice about separation and divorce. 

They are often successful people whose lives have been busy and they have focused on work and the children.  At the end of a demanding day there was not enough time or mental energy left to spend on their partner, and they often realise that they do not want to spend the rest of their lives and retirement with that person.

Lives changing, including children flying the nest, wanting to wind down at work, or having to care for elderly parents can bring stresses upon people and therefore on relationships.  Sometimes couples find they have challenges with their own health or mismatched levels of energy that cause difficulties.

If you find yourself in that situation, the first thing to do is to consider carefully whether the issue is to do with your partner or whether these external factors are causing the relationship to break down.  It is really worth exploring options as to whether fixing specific stresses could help your relationship and it can be worthwhile speaking to a GP if there are health or mental health issues at play.

If you are unsure whether the relationship remains salvageable then it is worth attending counselling together as a couple to explore whether any issues are as a result of the relationship or from external factors that could be addressed.  We can recommend some excellent couples counsellors.

If after considering all of the above you still feel that a separation or divorce would be best then speak to a family solicitor.  Often where couples have drifted apart, there is little hostility and so arrangements for a financial settlement need to be made sensibly and amicably together.   At other times, while one partner wishes to end the relationship, the other can feel that their happy and stable later years are being taken away, and again it is important to address that sensitively and perhaps at a slower pace.  Either way, it is important to have support from family, friends and a good family solicitor so that the outcome can be positive.

To discuss this, or any other family related matter with Dimple directly, please call us, email info@hartbrown.co.uk or start a live chat today.

*This is not legal advice; it is intended to provide information of general interest about current legal issues.

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Dimple Patel

Senior Associate, Family Law

Dimple is a Senior Associate Solicitor in the family law department. She qualified as a solicitor in 2007 after reading law at City University and...

Hart-Brown

Senior Associate, Family Law

Dimple Patel

Dimple is a Senior Associate Solicitor in the family law department. She qualified as a solicitor in 2007 after reading law at City University and has worked as a family solicitor in both Surrey and London. She joined Hart Brown in 2022.

Her practice involves advising on all aspects of family law and in particular the financial aspects of divorce and dissolution of civil partnership. She has extensive experience in negotiating financial settlements and advises clients with substantial assets including family businesses, pensions, trusts, foreign assets and inherited wealth as well as clients with more modest income and assets. She also deals with the variation and enforcement of existing financial orders.

Dimple assists clients to protect assets and family wealth through prenuptial and postnuptial agreements. She also assists cohabiting couples with cohabitation agreements, financial and property disputes as well as financial claims for children of unmarried parents under Schedule 1 Children Act.

Dimple has considerable experience advising on arrangements for children following divorce and separation including relocation of children both within England and Wales and abroad. She also assists clients where there are concerns around domestic abuse through personal protection injunctions such as Non-Molestation and Occupations Orders.

Dimple is a member of Resolution, a national organisation of family lawyers and other professionals committed to the constructive resolution of family disputes. She aims to provide practical, tailored advice to enable her clients to make informed choices with a focus on early settlement.

Dimple often receives wonderful feedback from her clients, here are just a few testimonials.

“Dimple is very professional and reliable. I was able to always count on her excellent advice, quick responses to my queries and sympathetic balanced communications with all parties. I would whole heartedly recommend her to anyone dealing with family legal issues”

“Dimple quickly understood the challenges I was facing and we spoke a lot on the phone which I found helpful and calming. She is very bright, professional and warm and just the person one needs when dealing with difficult and unfamiliar issues. Dimple is committed, has good judgment and eye for detail. She is a highly competent solicitor and I highly recommend her.”

“Thank you so much for your help, support and advice through this difficult process. I appreciate all you’ve done and look forward to a brighter future, thanks to your help”

“Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me. You were so easy to work with at every stage of the game and I really appreciated having you to turn to. I still can’t believe how smoothly everything went! And the good news is, I’m genuinely finding happiness again in my life.”

“Thank you for your assistance and support over the last few years in relation to my difficult and challenging divorce proceedings and help to conclude the child matters with the best result I could have hoped for. I appreciate all your efforts on my case. I am so happy that I am spending quality time with my son and that he is getting to know his extended paternal family. Thank you for helping to make this happen.”